The Pilot continued to text me like crazy after our first talk and at first I was flattered and then I was amused and then I was just almost, nearly, kind of on my way to being somewhat smitten just with the fact that his texts were witty and funny and entertained me while I was working.
As is my style when it came to that tricky world of virtually meeting someone and then trying to find a way to blend into actually meeting in person I was always iffy about that. I didn't want to be blindsided by the fact that even though his texts are awesomely witty he was actually a professional axe murderer who liked to axe people on the first date.
I'll fully admit that whenever he would bring up meeting, I'd vaguely make a comment and then do the textual "Oh, look it's a fucking bear!" and talk about something else. It just so happened at that time it was the middle of winter and I was spending all my time outside at work training people in sub-zero temperatures and managed to catch myself a case of Bronchitis and had the perfect excuse as to not meet right yet.
But wouldn't you know it, the turd face managed to weasel a meeting out of me and reluctantly I agreed to a date despite the fact that I was sick and could probably infect him because that's how I roll on first dates.
Just to be safe I told him that I'd meet at Smitty's. For those of you who don't know what Smitty's is it's kind of like an IHOP. Filled with old people. And pancakes. Served by old people. Naturally it's the safest place to hold any type of first meeting because if he does try to axe me the old people would save me. Or shuffle away while I got chopped. Really, it's a 50/50 chance with that crowd.
The thing about that date, though, was I had to run errands most of the day and (as I thought) clearly expressed this to The Pilot but he must of understood it as "She's going to run errands but it's going to only take like five minutes and then we can go on our date. So any time after five minutes I'll text her and let her know that I'm already at Smitty's and I'll eagerly await her to show up and when it takes another forty minutes I'll text every five minutes until I get results.".
Yeah, that happened and it rushed me like who knows what and I had to keep saying (for some reason I didn't want to tell him the truth and admit that I was still in sweatpants and grocery shopping clothes and had not yet had a chance to get changed) that I was on my way despite the fact I wasn't. As I hurried to get ready I made up excuses that the taxi was late (at this point in time I didn't drive so it was a valid excuse) and he would counter with "I'll pick you up!" which would then have me decide to say "There's a lot of traffic!" which on any given day it could be true.
Once I finally did get into the cab though and get on my way I was bombarded with a taxi driver who gave me a long winded story about how in his country he was an Engineer and was top of his class but when he came over to Canada no one wanted to hire him and he was forced to drive a taxi for a living and Hey! Wouldn't you know it? I worked for A Giant Oil Company that always needs Engineers!
The taxi driver gave me his resume. Which he just so happened to have in the glove box of his taxi van and eagerly handed it to me as he pulled up into the parking lot of the restaurant.
Resume in hand, I got out of the van only to see The Pilot standing outside of the restaurant holding a single rose and looking utterly adorable.