As I stated in an earlier post today was the day that my dog got his nuts chopped off and because The Pilot is such a suck butt and couldn't be away from his dog for like five minutes or overnight, I begged the techs to let us take him home only if we promised to bring him in for a check up in the morning just to make sure, like, he didn't die or commit suicide throughout the night because they had stolen his balls.
Needless to say he was sort of drugged up and I had this plan that I was going to pick the winner of the giveaway by writing their names on little pieces of paper and throwing them in a frenzy at the dog and which ever one ended up in his protective cone would win. But those bastards didn't give him a cone and I'm pretty sure it's because I warned them not to charge me if they find an extra nut.
So with no cone I was highly disappointed as we left the vet only to be highly amused by the fact that my dog is in fact stoned. And lucky for him he will be able to get stoned tomorrow because they gave us more pain killers for him to hand out throughout the next couple days because obviously they think I'm a dink and want me to get my dog addicted to prescription medications I probably wont be able to afford thus pushing him into a doggy gang that would lead to him someday getting stabbed. All because I asked about that third nut.
Just to show how stoned my dog is I naturally took pictures and it's like....he looks pretty fucking happy for a dog who just had his nuts forcefully removed from between his legs.
Without a cone I had to come up with another way to find out who the winner was and after some heavy debates and a few stiffen shots and laughing at my dog as he sort of wanders around in a daze and then panicking a bit because he may or may not have pulled some of his stitches, I managed to find a winner.
Jen O. just happens to be the lucky person who gets that Dork T-Shirt from Dork Designs and now that means the rest of you can weep and cry and possibly lynch mob her. Who knows, maybe the person who manages to dislodge her from her horse in a long drawn out civil battle could get the t-shirt instead!