I'd Like To Say I'm Bigger Than Sliced Bread But I Don't Want To Make The Bread Cry.

Technically it's almost sort of end of the year and it's the time people wake up and make promises and look back at the last year and say "Holy crap that last year totally ass-raped me and I'm still extremely sore from it!" or when you look back at it and you say "Holy crap, I just ass-raped that last year and I'm going to give this new year an ass-beating too!" and then you move on and forget about any ass-rapings you may or may not have received and focus on the new year.

But until I can manage to do that I've got to look back at this year and what this blog is and how awesome it's been sitting here in front of the computer pecking my little fingers to death to bring the humour and the laughter and probably make all of you feel as if I've soiled you.

And it might also be because our plans to head home have been delayed by a day and I don't have any funny travel stories to tell you because that probably wont happen until tomorrow. So you're sort of suck with this cheap year-end-round so I can forcefully show you how awesome I am.

How I Ass-Raped My Readers (Or, Top Ten Blog Posts Of 2011)

10. That White Stain You've Been Sleeping On? Yeah, That Totally Could Have Been Your New Brother.

9. It's Like She Does This Everyday.

8. Because When You Eat Soup You Automatically Have To Shit.

7. Being The One Not Pushing Out The Baby, I Am So Tired.

6. Poop University, I'm Going!

5. Polygamy Just Sort Of Made My Life Awesome.

4. What DO Meth Stains Look Like On A Carpet?

3. I Had A Give Away.

2. Unicorns: Judgemental Asshole Prudes.

NUMBER ONE:

The Littlest Hobo? More Like The Stupidest Hobo.



And that totally sums up my blog for 2011 and you can be rest assured that this blog will be pumping out more of that pure, offensive, Orphan hating gold that it's known for. Or maybe more kitten punching just because.