Friday, September 9, 2011

I Am Sort Of Hoping He Melts To The Side Walk

Right now, I am sort of wondering if the weather has decided to turn around and fuck us all over again because at the start of the Summer it was mildly hot and riddled with forest fires and then it started to rain and give us floods and now it's all "I haven't broke your spirit yet? Well, here's some more terrible times to fuck you up and by the time Fall comes, I hope you are dead." and that's exactly what it's been doing.

It's been so hot the last few days that I am kind of hoping that when I take the dog out for a walk he melts to the sidewalk because I am tired of him sitting around and hiding under the bed because he thinks it will make it colder for him.

And he always gets stuck.

Because he's special.

And I don't want to save him because I am already held up by the heat that I just want to lounge on my couch with an over sized fan, a mint julep and talk with a Southern drawl while asking for the help of handsome strangers to do menial work for me. Shirtless.

2 comments:

  1. Best first paragraph ever. Epic. By fall, I hope you are dead. I'm not sure where you're from exactly, but this summer we on the East Coast have lived through a Hurricane, a Tornado, an Earthquake, major flooding, and Barack Obama "visiting the damaged areas"... what more can we be asked to deal with :(

    ReplyDelete
  2. Somehow, I don't think The Pilot would go along with this plan of yours...

    ReplyDelete

I once punched a baby kitten and then it died of cancer. The punch might have given it cancer. Comment or I'll punch you in the baby-maker.

 
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