Hey there Friends that I have been ignoring because life is so busy and important and too cool for any of you to actually be apart of the group but I do still sort of feel bad for you so when all the cool kids leave then I am sort of willing to hang out with you but I stand five feet away just incase your uncoolness is catching! How have you been? Good? Great? AWESOME!
I'd like to recant a special story to you all that happened a few nights ago that I feel you will enjoy.
I'm a whore for back tickles. If you have fingers and you can move them I will probably force you to tickle my back until you develope finger pain and then they fall off. You can say I'm addicted to them because I can't fall asleep unless I am tickled to sleep and The Pilot is the one stuck tickling me no matter how many times he tries to tag in the dog to do it. That fucker scratches.
The other night The Pilot fell asleep tickling me and it sucked because I had not fallen asleep before him. So, I started to move around and in his sleep state he started to give me shitty tickles. They may have sucked, but they were still tickles and I need my god damn fix. So I moved some more and got more tickles. And then I started to talk to make sure if he was sleeping or not and no matter what I said, I got tickles as if his sleeping mind was trying to shut me the hell up and leave him alone.
So I was making sounds just to get tickles. That's how bad I need these things.
And then I farted.
And he gave more tickles than I had previously gotten just by talking to him.
I farted and that sleeping fucker took it as I was talking and gave me mega tickles.
And then it stunk and woke him up.
The end.
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I once punched a baby kitten and then it died of cancer. The punch might have given it cancer. Comment or I'll punch you in the baby-maker.